After months of waiting you are finally bringing your newborn home! All of your preparation has come to this very moment, as you face your baby in your car seat and think to yourself, okay… now what? Your baby’s homecoming is a special moment, but it is also filled with a lot of uncertainty. How do I know that my baby is feeding well? What if my baby keeps crying? What do I do when I am so frustrated and just cant take anymore? In this article, we will discuss surviving the first night at home with your newborn.
If you are expecting a new baby, I would love to meet with you to go over everything that you need to know about childbirth and newborn care. Both in-home and virtual visits are available! CLICK HERE to schedule a visit at your convenience. Not only do I offer a free introductory visit, but all consults over one hour come with a free gift package of premium parent resources!
What to expect when you get home
Surviving the first night is not easy. Your arrival home will be so exciting, but it does take a few weeks to get into the groove of things. Here are a few things to expect when you get home.
Feeding
Your baby should be eating every 2-3 hours, or an average of 6-8 times per day. Formula-fed babies usually eat less frequently than breastfed babies, around every 3 hours. Breast milk is easily digested and comes in smaller amounts, so it is normal for your baby to eat more frequently while breastfeeding.
If your baby does not show feeding cues after 3-4 hours, it is very important to wake them up by changing the diaper and placing the baby skin-to-skin. If you are planning on breastfeeding, make sure to nurse the baby frequently, and make sure that the baby is adequately transferring milk.
Please refer to my free BEGINNERS GUIDE TO BREASTFEEDING for more information about breastfeeding.
Diaper changes
Diaper changes are a necessary part of surviving the first night (although sometimes you probably hope that the diaper magically cleans itself)! Try to change your baby’s diaper before every feeding, and do a quick check after the feeding as well. This will help make sure your baby eats well, and rests well after the feeding.
Your baby should have one wet diaper according to the baby’s age in days until day 6. For example, your baby should have at minimum 1 wet diaper on day 1, 2 diapers on day 2, and so on. Call your doctor if the urine seems concentrated or abnormal.
Infant stools are an interesting science. When your baby is first born, it is black to dark green. The good part is that it does not smell very bad. It than starts to transition to more green, and then finally yellow. Breastfeeding babies usually have a seedy texture to their stool.
Your baby should have at least one bowel movement on day 1, two on day two, and three on day 3. After that, every baby is different. Some will stool barely 3 times a day, and some 8-10 times. Pay attention to your baby, and listen to their cues for changes.
Sleeping
It would be nice if all babies came out sleeping through the night! However, most babies tend to sleep more during the day and are more active at night. Try to develop a nighttime routine as early as possible. This will hopefully teach the baby that night time is sleep time, and day time is awake time.
Most babies nap every 2-3 hours, although some do “cluster feed”. This is when they feed for hours almost non-stop, then decide they want to sleep. This is very common in the first few days. If you are breastfeeding, keep feeding your baby on cue, and their sleep pattern will eventually regulate.
Crying
Crying is completely normal for a newborn baby. Remember that a newborn baby cannot verbalize to you what they want. Instead, they will cry until they are helped. Especially in the first few days, you will find that your baby wants to be held, wants to be skin-to-skin, and wants to nurse frequently. This is completely normal behavior.
When your baby is crying, try the “checklist for surviving the first night” that I have below. Notice that feeding is down on the bottom. If you are bottle-feeding, a lot of parents just give the bottom as soon as the baby starts crying. However, many times the baby is crying for something else besides hunger. In addition, breastfeeding moms want to calm their baby down by going down this checklist first. Then you can attempt to feed your baby if needed. It is very difficult to breastfeed a crying baby.
If you are expecting a new baby, I would love to meet with you to go over everything that you need to know about childbirth and newborn care. Both in-home and virtual visits are available! CLICK HERE to schedule a visit at your convenience. Not only do I offer a free introductory visit, but all consults over one hour come with a free gift package of premium parent resources!
Surviving the first night checklist
When your baby starts crying, try this checklist to help calm them down! Sometimes your baby is crying over something very small that you can fix quickly.
- Check the diaper
- Sing, have soothing noises, shushing
- Burp the baby
- Hold and rock the baby gently
- Feed the baby
What not to expect
Equally as important as understanding what to expect, is what not to expect. If you see any of these signs, it is recommended to follow up with your pediatrician for further instructions.
Yellow skin
Yellow skin can be a sign of jaundice in a newborn. Long-term jaundice can cause permanent brain damage if left untreated. The best thing you can do to prevent jaundice is offer frequent and effective feedings.
Normal newborns have much higher levels of bilirubin than adults. Your pediatrician will be checking the bilirubin frequently, and treatment usually includes supplementation (with expressed milk or formula), as well as special light photo-therapy. Extreme cases might need a blood transfusion and possible NICU stay.
Foul smell/discharge from the umbilical cord
Any foul smell or drainage from anywhere in the body is usually not a good sign. The umbilical cord should fall off in about 1-3 weeks. Keep the site clean and dry, and call the doctor if the cord appears to be infected.
Keep in mind that you should let the cord come off on its own. Try not to pull on it, even when there are only a few tissues holding it in place. Treatment for an umbilical cord infection is usually cauterizing (burning) the cord and possible antibiotics as necessary.
Projectile vomiting
One thing to know is that it all newborns will spit up. However, it is important to know when your newborn spit up is not normal. First, you always look at your baby. How do they look? Do they look uncomfortable? Feel the belly as well. A hard belly can simply be gas, or might be something much more serious.
Any projectile vomiting should warrant a call to the pediatrician. You should especially mention if it is green or any other abnormal color. Sometimes the spit up will look like old digested milk, and that is fine. When it doubt, it never hurts to ask!
Respiratory distress
Pay attention to your child! Early intervention really can make such a difference when it comes to respiratory distress in newborns. Understanding the signs of respiratory distress will help you in surviving the first night.
You may refer to my PARENT’S GUIDE : RESPIRATORY DISTRESS for treatment and CPR techniques for your baby.
- Color changes: newborns who have difficulty breathing cannot circulate oxygen effectively throughout their body. Because of this, you might notice their skin turning blue around their mouth, lips, and even fingernails.
- Grunting: Grunting is a special sound that can be heard when someone exhales (breathes out). If a baby is grunting, immediately let your healthcare staff know. If you are home, bring your baby to the Emergency Room to check it out.
- Breathing Rate: infants usually have a faster breathing rate than adults. However, if your baby seems like he/she is breathing a lot faster than normal, that can be a sign of distress. Normal newborn respiration rate is 30-60 breaths per minute
- Nasal Flaring: The nose flares when someone is working hard to breathe. Basically, you will find the nostrils opening wider when the baby takes a breath in.
- Retractions: A retraction is when the check appears to sink in with each breath. It is a way the baby is trying to bring more air into the lungs. You might see retractions in a premature baby, and it might even come and go. Either way, it is so important to let your doctor know if you see retractions on your baby.
- Wheezing: If you hear a musical whistling sound, that means that the air passages are closing in. This could be because of allergies, infection, even asthma.
Tips for surviving the first night
Bringing a new baby home is such a blessing for your family! However, it also requires a lot of research and preparation before hand. Here are some of my tips for surviving the first night at home.
If you are expecting a new baby, I would love to meet with you to go over everything that you need to know about childbirth and newborn care. Both in-home and virtual visits are available! CLICK HERE to schedule a visit at your convenience. Not only do I offer a free introductory visit, but all consults over one hour come with a free gift package of premium parent resources!
Skin-to-skin as much as possible
SKIN-TO-SKIN is very soothing to a newborn. Not only does it keep them warm, but it also helps calm them down when they are over-stimulated. It also helps you to get acquainted with your baby’s feeding cues and behaviors.
Ask for help
You should never feel like you are alone in this. Ask for help when you need. Work out a plan with a loved one to help take turns so you can catch a break! It is also very helpful to have a strong support system as you prepare for your baby. I offer personal consultations that you can schedule by emailing me at mommydidyouknow@gmail.com
Take a break
Never neglect the power of a catnap! Sometimes all you need is one hour of blissful sleep to recharge your batteries. If you think that the stress is getting too much, put your newborn in a safe crib and take a nice breath. It is very important to avoid becoming too stressed to protect your baby from SHAKEN BABY SYNDROME. It is so important to inform your caregivers about this as well.
Nurse frequently
Frequent nursing can help by decreasing risk of mastitis and engorgement, helps bring in your mature milk quicker, and helps to regulate your milk supply. Frequent and efficient feedings is key to a healthy milk supply. Try to feed the baby at early feeding cues instead of waiting for the baby to start crying. You can always SCHEDULE A CONSULT with me to learn breastfeeding techniques and positions.
Understand it takes time
My next tip is to remember that all of this takes time. It will take a few weeks for you guys to get to know each other, and that is okay. Be patient, stay positive, and remember never to compare yourself to anyone. You probably will not swaddle like your nurses in the beginning. All good things comes with time, practice, and experience.
Make sure your baby is eating well
Just because your baby is breastfeeding does not necessarily mean that they are feeding well. The key to make sure your baby has a GOOD LATCH is by being aware and observant. There is no indicator to see how much your baby is eating, so you need to be aware of the signs that your baby and your body are giving you. By understanding these signs, you can help introduce early interventions to correct inadequate feedings right away. You can save your baby from countless extra testings and treatments, just by being aware
- Nipple shape: the shape of your nipple should be the same before and after the feeding. If your nipple is pointy after like a tube of lipstick, the baby might be sucking on the nipple only and not the areola
- Shape of the mouth: Your baby should have a wide and open mouth, about 140 degrees. If you do not like math, it is the shape your mouth makes when you make an “ahhh” sound. If your baby has a shape that looks like he is saying “oooohhhh” your baby might be only on the nipple. Simply insert a clean finger to break the seal, and start your latch and positioning process again.
- Mother’s comfort: People used to think that breastfeeding is painful. It is uncomfortable, but it should not be painful. As baby latches, you might feel tugging and a bit of sensitivity right as the baby latches on. It should go away after a few seconds, and only have a little tugging remaining. If you feel like your baby is pinching you, unlatch and try again. It only takes a few sucks with an improper latch to really mess your nipple up for a long time!
Conclusion
Congratulations on your new baby! It is such a blessing, and I am so happy that you are educating yourself on what to expect. Preparation brings a level of confidence that is so important to new parents. Remember that you can always check out our BABY ACADEMY for all of our prenatal resources for new parents. Please let me know if there is anything that I can do to help!
Free Prenatal Class
Enjoy a free prenatal class from the comfort of your own home! This is a course that I wrote based on a decade of professional and personal experiences regarding everything from childbirth to newborn care. This is a self-paced course that you can watch anytime and anywhere you want! You can sign up HERE. I look forward to connecting with you! – Rachel
Exciting News!!
Did you know that many insurance plans include FREE prenatal and postnatal consultations? See if you qualify by filling out this form: INSURANCE AUTHORIZATION FORM. Consultations can be virtual, in home, or in office with no out of pocket costs.
The step-by-step approach you’ve outlined not only addresses the immediate needs of the newborn but also considers the well-being of the parents, emphasizing the importance of self-care during this transformative time. Your advice reflects a genuine concern for the holistic experience of bringing a newborn home, from setting up a comfortable sleeping space to offering tips on bonding and creating a calm atmosphere.