Bye Bye Supermom – Why You Don’t Need To Be Perfect

I would like you to meet “supermom”. She always has her hair in a perfect bun with absolutely no strays. She wears a smile as she cleans the house to perfection. Her floors are so clean that you can see your reflection off of it. To top it all off, she actually washes the clothes AND puts them away in the same day!

Supermom found a recipe online and she has a perfect meal waiting for her husband and children when they come home (and no mess in the kitchen or sink). She is a member of the PTA and every other school organization for that matter. She is even planning a perfect birthday party using a DIY Pinterest board for ideas.

THIS WOMAN DOES NOT EXIST!!

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Reality Check

Every day women around the world are killing themselves trying to be the perfect mom. They see Martha Stewart with her perfect dress and perfect house, and think that they have to live up to the same expectations. However, most moms today forget about one critical factor: limitations.

Being a mom changes many things in your life, but it does not magically cause you to grow a cape and have superpowers. In fact, many people on the road to become “supermom” neglect their important relationships, make financially irresponsible decisions, and suffer many health issues in an attempt to achieve perfection. You are not perfect! Imperfection is not a weakness, it is beauty.

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Celebrating the Imperfect Mom

Instead of focusing all of our attention on supermom, lets spend some time on a real mom. Lets celebrate the fact that mom can make an impromptu gift out of McDonald’s toys and old gift wrap paper. Mom finds nothing wrong with buying Publix cookies for the bake sale (they probably taste better anyways).

Our “imperfect” mom had a long day, the house is messy, her hair is frizzy, but her children are safe and happy. There might be some toys on the floor, but she just spent the last 20 minutes playing astronaut with her kids. She has a smile, despite feeling the whole world on her shoulders.

She understands that she cannot do this alone. She is aware that there is no “perfect mom”, so she knows it is okay to ask for help. Mom opens up to her husband when she is feeling overwhelmed. She understands that it really takes a village to raise a family and asking for assistance is not a sign of weakness, but it is a sign of strength!

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Be the Best Mom You Can Be

It is time to pull the plug on supermom. We all have limitations, and that is okay! I just want you to know that your family does not need a “supermom”, they just need you. You are perfect just the way you are, quirks and all. It is time you accept your limitations and work to be the best that you can be. Stop trying to do it all, and just learn how to be you. Here are a few ways:

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Don’t be afraid to ask for help

I have mentioned this before, but it is so important to ask for help when you need it. Working as a team is not weakness, it is strength. If you need a break, ask for it. Sometimes as moms, we feel like we just need to “keep going”. We feel like moms do not need a break, and asking for one makes you a bad mom. You care about your family, but you need to take care of yourself too!

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Relax

It is time to stop stressing about every little detail and take a big breath. Stop chasing after dreams of perfection and living up to grandiose expectations of a perfect life with no trials. Life is beautiful, but it is also chaotic. As the waves crash you need to learn how to move with the flow and be flexible with the tide. Stop paying attention to every detail and just…relax!

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Cherish Your Important Relationships

I specifically am using the word “cherish” because this word means to “protect and care for lovingly”. You need to protect your relationships with love. If there is someone who means a lot to your family, cherish that relationship. To care for someone also means to develop the relationship. Someone who takes care of a plant or animal waters it so it can grow. Keep feeding your relationships with love and it will grow into something beautiful.

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Stop Comparing Yourself

Moms…just stop it! Stop comparing yourself to other moms, you do not know what they are going through. You might see a perfect life on social media, that does not mean that their life is actually perfect. Most people put up a different face to the public than their family. Do not compare your circumstances with anyone else. You know who you are, and you are beautiful just like that.

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Rest

Try to have periods of rest throughout the week. I mentioned it before, but you cannot take care of others if you do not take care of yourself. Try to have a good night’s rest because that is so important for your physical and emotional health. Clear your mind before you sleep and try to relax before bed. If you have trouble sleeping, minimize electronic use and television before bed. Although we try to deny it, every single one of us needs rest!

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Listen to Your Children

Children want many things in their mom, but being supermom is not one of them. Listen to your child to see what is important to them. Here are a few questions you can ask your child to see what they need in their mom.

“What is “awesome” about mommy?“

“How do you know that mommy loves you?“

“What makes you feel happy?“

“What makes you feel sad?“

“What are 5 words that can describe mommy?“

“What is the nicest thing that mommy ever did for you?‘

Listening to your child can open up new avenues in your relationship. Children are a lot more intelligent than we give them credit for!

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Conclusion

I hope that this article helped you to let go of the idea of “supermom” and embrace the real you instead. How have you given up on being supermom? Please comment below with your ideas on how to drop the supermom cape and instead embrace the real you.

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